9007 Living in Italy: In your opinion!

Hi, I dont think you choose the place I think it chooses you, when we were looking we visited a few different areas, firstly le marche, then (like everyone ) Tuscany but on the way found ourselves in the mountains of Emilia Romagna which is where we eventually bought a house and now live.
For me I knew as soon as I had found the right place and I stopped looking, I have never found a place in Italy that i did nt like but for me this was where I wanted to stay.
We are 2 hrs from Bologna and Tuscany is just over the hill.
Its beautiful countryside (v quiet) great place for kids, if your hubby has to go to London Parma airport is just over 1 hr away.
People here are welcoming and friendly, I have a friend who is originally from Columbia and she has settled here, with her 2 kids, I dont think she has had any problems regarding her colour and her children have lots of friends.
To be honest I think in these rural areas they welcome strangers as it makes life a bit more interesting, someone new to talk to.
When I moved here the guy who owned the bar (aged 78) bought himself an English dictionary which i thought was a really friendly thing to do.
Anyway all I would suggest is visit a few places and see if you are 'grabbed' until you are dont buy anything! good luck

thanks very much...very good advice..that is what we thought would need to happen...this is how we settled in Sydney when we first married...our now home just sort of grabbed us ...

Hi, I guess the idea is to do as much homework as you can on areas, bearing in mind your husbands job and accessability to airports etc, and then come out and have a good look around to see what suites you. We have lived in Marche for over 2 years now and know for us we have made the right choice, the infrastructure is good, roads, access to airports and good health care are also a facor that influenced our choice. Not to mention the beautiful countryside, we live between the mountains and the sea, in a landscape of high rolling hills, valleys, and perfect hilltop villages.

Everyone is going to say their area is best!, and of course for them it is. And I doubt that colour or for some people sexual orientation presents any problem to the Italians, certainly in this rural area, they are just interested in you as a person and are welcoming and friendly.
So good hunting
Angie

I don't think Ive ever heard of Marche until these last two post....this calls for some research on the area..
I agree research and 'homework' as you call it is vital... that is the good thing about me ..I'm big into research and people who know me know that I can pretty much research every detail about anything..its hard never being in the country..I think the first two visit at the end of this year and early next year will be very important trips for us..but because Italy is so far from Australia..it is hard to just go for an adventure..which is why our fist visit will most likely be around 8-10 weeks long!
Once again thanks for the positive responses!

Take it from me, if you want to work in Italy, learn the language first. At least until you are quite competent with it.

The amount of brick walls, so to speak that i have run into, just because i couldn't speak the lingo has been unreal. Perhaps in the North you [I]may[/I] have more chance finding work, but it's still very difficult none the less.

Of course, if you can speak the lingo, then you will have no problems finding work as some companies are looking for English speaking staff.

I think that, in order to help you effectively, we need to know where you would prefer to live. Are you after an apartment or a house with a garden? In a city, a small town or the country?
Certainly, because of your husband travels you need to be near an airport... say 1 hour distance maximum and an airport which has a reasonable amount of year-round flights, not seasonal ones.
We would also need to know the things that you enjoy or value the most in your life. I see that you lived in Sydney for a while, but Sydney is a city where you can have a very hectic city life or live a quiet life in suburbia. So this does not help when it comes to give you advice.
Basically, a city will give you more work.
Think at all this and give us some answers which may help us to help you.

Hi,
Try my site (I am building it slowly so it is a bit limited) [url=http://www.southernlemarche.com]LE MARCHE[/url] and that of a friend [url=http://www.marchebreaks.com]Marche Breaks |[/url] These should give you an overview of our wonderful region.
I agree that in this area colour of skin does not pose a problem. Come and take a look! It really is beautiful here and I believe that central italy offers the best quality of life. Le Marche has the highest life expectancy in Italy (or was it Europe?).
Regards
Jo

You really need to decide on something (lifestyle/size of house etc!!!!!!) Italy is a huge country and the differences throughout it are huge. I have lived in the last 3 years in Calabria, Florence and Milan and also spent a lot of time in Rome. To me the North (Milan) is the most like the UK and (subject to speaking Italian) that makes it easy to adjust .. especially for your husband to work. Rome is splendid but chaotic. Calabria is like being in a different continent!!! Finding work in Italy is, in my experience, exceptionally difficult and most TEFL posts are very badly paid (think around 1,000 euro a month) Also, I don't necessarily agree with everyone else's view here about colour making no difference. After living in the UK, I was surprised that the Italians are quite un PC. I am not saying they are racists but they are light years behind (when was the last time you saw a woman in power here... apart from Mussolini's granddaughter, never mind a coloured face?). On that score there will be no substitute for coming and finding out. They have had a lot of problems with immigrants (both legal and illegal) and maybe for that reason they tend to lump people together, although maybe when they find out that you are English that will reassure them... I for instance (due to my colouring maybe) am often taken for Romanian (who also seem to be rather unpopular in Italy) and it is only when they speak to me and find out that I am from the UK do the shutters come down. There are lots of fantastic things about Italy but it is no paradise so take your time and visit lots before you leap! Good luck!

[quote=Italiargh;84934]Take it from me, if you want to work in Italy, learn the language first. At least until you are quite competent with it.

The amount of brick walls, so to speak that i have run into, just because i couldn't speak the lingo has been unreal. Perhaps in the North you [I]may[/I] have more chance finding work, but it's still very difficult none the less.

Of course, if you can speak the lingo, then you will have no problems finding work as some companies are looking for English speaking staff.[/quote]

I agree with you...which is why I have been studying Italian for the last 6 months..although I have been very naughty with my studies lately! I don't intend to go to a country and expect to speak my native language..at least not all the time..Id much rather not to be honest!:no:

[quote=Gala Placidia;84944]I think that, in order to help you effectively, we need to know where you would prefer to live. Are you after an apartment or a house with a garden? In a city, a small town or the country?
Certainly, because of your husband travels you need to be near an airport... say 1 hour distance maximum and an airport which has a reasonable amount of year-round flights, not seasonal ones.
We would also need to know the things that you enjoy or value the most in your life. I see that you lived in Sydney for a while, but Sydney is a city where you can have a very hectic city life or live a quiet life in suburbia. So this does not help when it comes to give you advice.
Basically, a city will give you more work.
Think at all this and give us some answers which may help us to help you.[/quote]

Thanks for the comment..for starters we are initially interested in South Italy as well as living near the Sea. But on the other hand we love cool weather as well ...as my husband grew up in the snowy mountains of Australia. We would love to live in an area where we are literally forced to practice our Italian and living in a large city does not appeal to us as we only live in Sydney at the moment because of the work that is available for my husband's business.

We enjoy the beach, nature, and the beauty of life. The things that we enjoy and value the most are is having a family and our faith in God..we value good relationships with people and hoping to build some great relationships with others wherever we live ..we don't like to keep to ourselves as most people do in Sydney..which makes it very hard to live in this city. We don't really have a hectic lifestyle but it is defiantly busy..and not being busy would be great for awhile...I myself don't need to teach English or actually not really fussed about the low pay..but thought it would be something to do to keep my busy and help me with my Italian as well..it was just a thought.

Ideally we would love to live near an airport so that my husband can fly to London each week in the beginning but not forever as he would like to work in Italy and stay home. So living in a house with a garden in a small-medium size town would be great.

I hope this gives you a better idea of what we are looking for.

Grab a map. Draw two lines. One about 20km from the coast. The other about 50km. You'll find plenty of towns reasonabley close to the beach yet if you go the other way near the mountains. Use the airports to cut the list down some more. The hill towns can be very quiet during the winter so be prepared for that.

We have lived in Puglia for just over two years now; 30 yards from the beach. The people are wonderful, friendly and welcoming. Mostly rural, small villages and towns although we do of course have Lecce and other towns with wonderful historic centres.

There is a small english speaking community here - but other than that it's Italian all the way. No mountains or ski-ing though! And it does get very hot, although the winters (thankfully short) can be surprisingly cool. We have friends who moved here last year, the husband works as a project manager, commuting to London once a month and working from home the rest of the time. But I don't think it would be easy to find work locally as there is not a lot of industry. The wife is originally from the Caribbean - no problems here.

Hi again, Remy! Your answer to my query clarified a few things. As you mentioned that you liked Tuscany, I would suggest that you have a look around our area. We are only 25 minutes away from a provincial capital (Lucca) and an hour away from a busy airport with daily flights to London (Pisa). We are also about an hour away from the Versilia coast and its beaches, an hour and 45 minutes away from Florence (you can even go there by train without having to park the car), and to get to places such as Siena, San Gimignano, the Cinque Terre, Bologna, etc. is just a very pleasant day trip. We are surrounded by mountains in an extremely pretty and green area which extends basically from Ponte a Moriano, 15 minutes away from Lucca to the confines with the province of Pescia. Real Estate prices are still reasonable for the location. If you like the idea, have a look at [url=http://www.valdilima.com]Val di Lima - The guide to Bagni di Lucca and around - Start here![/url] for further information. You will also find properties listed through the Property section in Italymag. This is actually the way we found our house, an old mill on the banks of the Lima river, which we are restoring and decorating. If you enter the word "mulino" in "Search" you will find my thread.
The locals are very nice and welcoming, there is a number of foreigners from different countries, mainly Europeans, who also live in the area. Bagni di Lucca has been a spa town throughout history and people are used to see other people..
I understand what you said about Sydney as I lived in Australia for many years; however, it was further north, on the Gold Coast of Queensland, where people were also very friendly. Larger citiies tend to be more anonimous and people have problems trying to make friends and acquaintances.
I wish you all the best with your plans and do not hesitate to contact me if you have more queries, even if you prefer to do it through a private message. I will be happy to help.

I think Gala's suggestion is a good one, but in terms of airport access Lunigiana may be even better. We are about an hour from 3 airports: Pisa (45 mins-ish), Genoa (an hour and a quarter), and Parma (an hour and a quarter). We're about half an hour from the coast and more or less the same from the higher mountains for skiing. Furthermore, there is good motorway access without encountering too much horrible traffic. I know there are forum members who live in this area all year, so there should be direct experience to draw on. Depends, I suppose, on whether you are looking for a city or country life. Apart from Aulla there aren't many cities in Lunigiana. Maybe Sarzana?

[quote=LisaJ;84965] Also, I don't necessarily agree with everyone else's view here about colour making no difference. After living in the UK, I was surprised that the Italians are quite un PC. I am not saying they are racists but they are light years behind (when was the last time you saw a woman in power here... apart from Mussolini's granddaughter, never mind a coloured face?). On that score there will be no substitute for coming and finding out. They have had a lot of problems with immigrants (both legal and illegal) and maybe for that reason they tend to lump people together, although maybe when they find out that you are English that will reassure them... I for instance (due to my colouring maybe) am often taken for Romanian (who also seem to be rather unpopular in Italy) and it is only when they speak to me and find out that I am from the UK do the shutters come down. There are lots of fantastic things about Italy but it is no paradise so take your time and visit lots before you leap! Good luck![/quote]

I agree to some extent. At the end of the day nearly everyone has problems when they come out here and it will be your personality that will have to overcome the hurdles. Keep studying as this will be the key factor in your survival! Once the locals know you there should not be any problems, but that will take time unless you set upon a campaign of integration. The italians seem to have more problems with the Romanians and the Albanians than with anyone else.

The Italians are certainly way behind in terms of political correctness, but this is part of the charm. I always feel that I am living 30 or 40 (at times a 100!) years back in time and of course this has its good points in terms of feeling part of a community, but also its bad. I am 35 and single living in a hilltop village. For the first year when I was not working I was considered a prostitute by a minority of the village: foreign, single, no visible means of support (obviously the less educated ones or the old men with too much tetosterone). When I eventually was forced to visit the Carabinieri to make a complaint I was told that I was a pretty girl and should get a boyfriend and then I wouldn't be hassled so much!! I just cannot imagine a policeman in the UK saying that. It was really hard dealing with all this but today I am 100% a part of this village or "nostra Giovanna" as they tend to call me.

I think your biggest problem would be with italian men being too friendly whilst your husband is in the UK. You will have to learn to deal with this and find the correct balance between politeness and friendliness.

A key point is not to become paranoid. The italians will stare, that is what they do!! Don't take it personally, they stare at everyone.

Good Luck

[quote=jowilliams;85029] or [B]The Italians are certainly way behind in terms of political correctness, but this is part of the charm. I always feel that I am living 30[/B] [B]or 40 (at times a 100!) years back in time[/B] and of course this has its good points in terms of feeling part of a community, but also its bad.[/quote]
This is so very true. In many aspects of life in Italy, although they have all the mod-cons, like mobiles etc, their attitudes, particularly in the South are still half a century behind. Where the man is still the ruler of the house, the woman must be grateful, the eldest son is the next in line for the throne, etc

Of course we can't expect the whole world to move at the same pace, but this is where Italy's mentality is today (catching up though)

We live half way between Genoa and Pisa. I like Genoa, because it has a an ethnic mix and a real 'African quarter'. I have been brought up in port cities (Rotterdam and Bremen) and like the openess towards different cultures. As a whole you will find that communities nearer the coast are more open. We have struck the best of both worlds in the sense that it is both a traditional village with all it's tranquility as well as a commuting village for La Spezia, a major sea port and in easy striking distance of Genoa, Pisa and Parma (all 3 within an hour's drive). People will give you more notice than you would be used to in London and usually assume you sell towels, sunglasses and African crafts at the beach or local market. It is remarkably the occupation of 90% of the black population around here. However, certainly our experience has been that people are open to change their perceptions.

ps: also there is a sizable (white) Brazilian and Argentinian community in our area, who liven up the culture in general.

Like Jowilliams I'm single and have had to put up with some rather inaccurate assumptions. Last Saturday I went to my football club dinner in another small town and then took a 10 minute walk to meet up with some English friends in another bar. I'm tall and was striding along to get there when a little man walking the other way said 'quanto prendi?'. I used an Anglo-Saxon reply and kept walking. I wasn't physically scared, at my age more amused (and there are some working girls in that area), but it underlined the difficulty they have with independent women on their own.

When they get to know you on a personal level you'll be fine.

Just to add my little part of Italy, Abruzzo, Sea and mountains, national parks, reasonable priced housing, Pescara airport, and only 2 hours from Rome.
We've lived here for 2 years now and have loved every minute.
As far as colour, we have a young couple living in the next village, English but originally from Pakistan, they have lots of Italian friends and have never implyed to us that they have ever had any problems.

Stribs

[quote=sueflauto;85065]Like Jowilliams I'm single and have had to put up with some rather inaccurate assumptions. Last Saturday I went to my football club dinner in another small town and then took a 10 minute walk to meet up with some English friends in another bar. I'm tall and was striding along to get there when a little man walking the other way said 'quanto prendi?'. I used an Anglo-Saxon reply and kept walking. I wasn't physically scared, at my age more amused (and there are some working girls in that area), but it underlined the difficulty they have with independent women on their own.

When they get to know you on a personal level you'll be fine.[/quote]

I think that you are so right about the independaace..its like that in many other places as well.

[quote=jowilliams;85029]I agree to some extent. At the end of the day nearly everyone has problems when they come out here and it will be your personality that will have to overcome the hurdles. Keep studying as this will be the key factor in your survival! Once the locals know you there should not be any problems, but that will take time unless you set upon a campaign of integration. The italians seem to have more problems with the Romanians and the Albanians than with anyone else.

The Italians are certainly way behind in terms of political correctness, but this is part of the charm. I always feel that I am living 30 or 40 (at times a 100!) years back in time and of course this has its good points in terms of feeling part of a community, but also its bad. I am 35 and single living in a hilltop village. For the first year when I was not working I was considered a prostitute by a minority of the village: foreign, single, no visible means of support (obviously the less educated ones or the old men with too much tetosterone). When I eventually was forced to visit the Carabinieri to make a complaint I was told that I was a pretty girl and should get a boyfriend and then I wouldn't be hassled so much!! I just cannot imagine a policeman in the UK saying that. It was really hard dealing with all this but today I am 100% a part of this village or "nostra Giovanna" as they tend to call me.

I think your biggest problem would be with italian men being too friendly whilst your husband is in the UK. You will have to learn to deal with this and find the correct balance between politeness and friendliness.

A key point is not to become paranoid. The italians will stare, that is what they do!! Don't take it personally, they stare at everyone.

Good Luck[/quote]

I know what you mean about politeness and friendliness..because even here in Italy..it is taken the wrong way by Italian and Greek friends in the begginning...then they find out Im married and are very very very surprised. I think its because I am very outgoing and ouspoken...and I just love a good conversation and laugh..so Ive heard that in their opinion other women on seem that interested in their lives because they are keen on them and not a general interest or a geniune politeness..so its a bit surprising as they get to know me!

I would tend to choose a mid sized village where you can get to know people pretty quickly rather than a town.
Unfortunately in some parts of Italy men think all black women on their own are prostitutes as they are used to seeing trafficked women from West Africa standing around on country lanes etc looking for trade.I've not seen this in Abruzzo , maybe the laws are more stricly adhered to?
As has been said before any woman maried or single is seen as fair game by most Italian men but if you can make a bit of a joke about it while showing you are not interested you'll be fine.Unfortunately it is difficult to have male friends as you would in the UK as this is seen as you being 'available' and may result in more unwanted interest!!!

Er, where are all these Italian men that see me as fair game then?, no rude cracks please, but has not been my experience.
A

[quote=Angie and Robert;85178]Er, where are all these Italian men that see me as fair game then?, no rude cracks please, but has not been my experience.
A[/quote]

I agree with you there Angie, The Italian men I know are very polite and charming in the company of women of all ages.

There are plenty of prostitutes plying their trade along the coastal strip but they are very obvious and I don’t think that the men find it difficult to differentiate between them and other women.

[quote=Angie and Robert;85178]Er, where are all these Italian men that see me as fair game then?, no rude cracks please, but has not been my experience.
A[/quote]
Think our friendly Italian farmer thinks my wife is fair game, but she is quite adept at changing the conversation and he is at least 20 years younger. Just a matter of how you redirect the comments!!!!

And then there is Sardinia some of the best beaches in the world and 2hrs 20mins from London/Luton

[quote=Angie and Robert;85178]Er, where are all these Italian men that see me as fair game then?, no rude cracks please, but has not been my experience.
A[/quote]

Sulmona perhaps so I have been told!!! Wrong place Angie then!!! lol

yeah i think my husband is worried...he already thinks our Italian friends hit on me!