2353 Instructions

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed
through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside.

On a bar of Dial soap -- Directions: Use like regular soap.

On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after
heating."

On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."

On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."

On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."

On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."

On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not
enable you to fly."

On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

Category
Circolo di Conversazione

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Mon, 01/23/2006 - 02:04

:D That's good... little too much time on your hands there greatscott?

On the label of a bottled drink.-- "Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth."

On a portable stroller.-- Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage."

On a Boeing 747-- "Fragile. Do not drop."

On a remote control for a TV.-- "Not dishwasher safe."

On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame-- "Not to be used as a personal flotation device."

On the packaging for a wristwatch.-- "Warning! This is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants."

But the Winner is...

"Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer.
I think you know what I mean...:p

Melissa

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Mon, 01/23/2006 - 14:09

[QUOTE=greatscott]On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."

[/QUOTE]

Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz gave himself five-inch-long welts in March when he tried to iron his polo shirt while wearing it. "I've ironed that way five or six times," he said, "and never had it happen."

Submitted by Anonymous (not verified) on Tue, 01/24/2006 - 06:19

thinking of moving to italy with three children what british schools are there in tuscany, we are in the region of livorno which is not far from pisa, have tried internet but only found one in florence and one in geneo, please help.jay