3421 Pretty controversial decision

Relaxed or should I say axed

I spent 20 minutes replying about the cambiali, clicked the post button only to find that it's closed.

I can stand up for myself & won't use generalities when I do, I use facts & quote from docs.

If Marc feels that's the way it must go, then unfortunately it must stand, I have to abide by the rules & so should you. I have been given quite a bit of opportunity to tell my side of the story for which I am grateful.

Give it a rest & speaking of such.....

Lavender Field

I really hoped your last post would be your last post

Andy

I had to return after Graham posted. I didn't want to, but have the right to reply & went to the other Forum when he posted his reply there, instead of on this one.

Still waiting for the answers to the questions.

Thanks Andy

Lavender Field

Having asked Lavender a question last night - and having had no response by bed time (at my age that's 9.30!!!) I have just checked to find the thread closed down and I can undersatnd why.

I had a quick look at other messages by Lavender to try to get my head around her story. I was very interested to see her message on the "5 Minutes of fame" thread and her list ("though not complete") of appearances in film and the news media. At the risk of getting myself thrown off me thinks she is a bit of a drama queen

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Basta!

My €0.02: The mods were right.

A few people here might know enough about the individuals involved to be certain beyond all doubt who is the victim and who "needs to be given offence".

Many of those who have read the lengthy posts giving an account of what is alleged to have happened will probably have a gut feeling about who's in the right and who has behaved badly.

Some of us cynics will suspect that neither is wholly either.

Some won't give a hoot.

But the point is that it's the nature of forums such as this that we can never know for sure which side -- if either -- is giving the most truthful account and which side is most in the right. This is not the venue to make a judgement on the sort of disputes that are dealt with in the civil courts.

I do not think this forum should be allowed to be a platform for people to make allegations of action or inactions by a firm which are in breach of a civil contract and seem to verge on the criminally negligent. That could have serious consequences for a firm which might be the innocent victim of an unjustified attack by a malicious former client.

Nor should it be allowed to become a podium for a business person to make allegations about the financial management skills and personal probity of a client they are in dispute with. Such comments are unprofessional and, even if they should be true, they are of questionable relevance in a civil dispute.

I think this spat should be taken outside.

Al

EDIT: Or, as Kim/David said much more succinctly: "Basta!"

Hi everybody,

I'm new here, and I've been reading some of the great stuff on the forum's.

But can someone expalin what all this stuff about banning etc is? I'm really confused by all this.

Thanks

SZ

[QUOTE=Relaxed]Marc - I should warn you that the major protagonist in the recently closed thread appears to have found a more comfortable nest on another forum. (I think they have also locked "her" thread.) The "other" forum has been deserted by many posters for being too "PC" - I think this forum is going the same way. For Chr*sts sake - if people need to be given offence we should be able to give offence, and not be controlled by a 1984 Orwell thought police "for our own good".
I'm a tad upset that this (IMO) serious issue has got a bit confused with some "red top" abuse - but "protecting the dodgy lav" does not seem to me to be the duty of the Italymag forum administrators.[/QUOTE]
As I am the owner of the "other" forum, I do question why you think that 1) it has been deserted by many for being too PC and 2) why you object to the thread being closed?

We can only rehash things so much before it becomes tedious and downright rude. Yes I like to run a clean board,but is that so wrong. People want information and when names start getting called, the info gets lost. I let the thread run its course. I let both sides have their say and now everyone can make their own decision. If the other side had not wanted to respond though I would have closed it or maybe deleted it as it had no information except the fact that airing your dirty laundry in a public forum is probably not a very good idea.

If someone does not want a moderated board then they shouldn't sign up (agreeing to the terms of service). As I have seen how bad an unmoderated board can get (check out italylink.com/dualcit just to see) I see nothing wrong with a bit of big brother. My board is not financed and run by a large magazine. It is me, modding, programming, designing, etc. I like to think of it as my living room and if someone comes to my house and causes the other guests to feel uncomfortable I think it is my duty as a good host to eliminate the problem.

[LEFT]As a public Forum I think it is right for people to raise specific issues and share useful information. Equally, however, we are all charged with achieving a balance – an equilibrium – among members and their inputs and as such, we should seek to ensure that the contents of threads and postings are not defamatory or libellous in any way.

Both parties have expressed their opinions (one obviously more than the other), but this is an issue that can only be resolved outside of this forum. The specific merits of this case are best left to both parties and their lawyers to deal with. It is really time for this thread to stop now, as it is really going nowhere and has gone far enough.

There are always going to be instances where heated exchanges will occur. This is inevitable. But I don’t see why should they be allowed to escalate into protracted, vitriolic wars or into situations where attacks of a pernicious nature are being made.

Editing, deleting or closing any thread that fails to respect forum rules, or when they reach a point of becoming perpetuating and self-destructing “Laundromats” for airing potentially litigious matters in public has nothing to do with being PC or not![/LEFT]

Well, first of all my compliments on your site, which I visited for the first time a couple of days ago. There are a few comments on there from established members musing on "political correctness", and one or two members on the Italymag site have told me that they find your site a little bland - but it is entirely your choice, as you say, you regard it as your living room.

The thread on the Italymag forum which was closed had developed in the last few days to something very similar to the thread on your forum. It was washing laundry in public stuff - for the second time around - and a lot of members were fed up with the repeated dramatic recantation and were basically (some politely, others less politely) suggesting that the drama queen left the stage - which she had promised us all just a few days ago that she would.

I suppose I shouldn't have objected to the deletions and locking of the thread, since a lot of the deleted stuff was laundry washing!!

[QUOTE=Relaxed] and one or two members on the Italymag site have told me that they find your site a little bland [/QUOTE] Interesting. This is the second time I have heard this in the past two days (the first by Lav). Never saw it as bland. We have had our share of dustups that is for sure. I think, and please correct me if I am wrong, that a lot has to do with where we all come from. This forum is very UK based so a lot of the humor etc. just doesn't make me giggle (just don't understand much) and I think in some ways I do not get all of the little subtleties. My site, which has only about 30% of UK members tends to have their own little quirks and humor but they may also be missed by non USAians if that makes sense. But getting back to bland. I just think that if you want information, then bland may be good so that the info does not get lost. Playtime, debates, etc. on the otherhand can be had in our private areas (like the circolo here) Oh and then we have things like our get togethers (the one for June wil have over 180 members all together) where we can really let our hair down and if need be, show our true colors :eek:

[quote=cristina] My board is not financed and run by a large magazine. It is me, modding, programming, designing, etc. I like to think of it as my living room and if someone comes to my house and causes the other guests to feel uncomfortable I think it is my duty as a good host to eliminate the problem.[/quote]

I haven't used your forum that much because it is based around USA use but I am a member and dip in and out now and then. Many of your guides are very helpful. I just wanted to say that the reason why your forum works well is because as you say it's like your living room, you give it your time and a personal eliment. You treat your members as people and no doubt understand all their foibles, in that way you have control. Can't see anything bland about it at all. Well done for achieving such a helpful forum all on your own! :)